Pull out a man’s hair and try to crush his skull on a patch of hard ice? Two games.

Ryan Reaves’ punishment for doing this against Avs defenseman Ryan Graves last night was administered today by the NHL’s Department of Player Safety. This department is NOT affiliated with the Redundancy Department, written by Joseph Heller.

This is what I predicted all day to be the punishment, having heard in the morning that Reaves would only get a “hearing” and not an “in person (Zoom)” hearing.

My personal opinion on this stuff is this: the decision is based on the injury to the victim, not the act itself. What if Ryan Graves stayed down and suffered some sort of serious head injury that the Avs said would keep him out for the rest of this series? Then Reaves is probably suspended for 6-7 games, maybe more.

But Graves is a tough kid who doesn’t complain about things, so he kept playing after he was probably eliminated by the Avs / NHL concussion folks. Vegas was crazy about his shot on Mattias Janmark, and it’s okay to want to hit him hard after something like that. I mean, I believe in that kind of old testament hockey brand.

But trying to smash a man’s head into hard ice, let alone a flurry of more punches and a blind punch?

No, it’s over the line. He’s not a real badass. It is to be a coward.

Reaves got both games because of the politics of the situation. Graves sort of escaped not being seriously hurt. Reaves has a suspension history, but not such a serious suspension history of, say, a Nazem Kadri. So that counted in this decision. Reaves undoubtedly still has some favoritism among the old boys network of the “code of hockey” in that he “was just defending a teammate” with what he did. Former NHL executor George Parros belongs to this old school group.

To quote Todd Bertuzzi: “It is what it is.” I think, as Avs fans hoping for real justice against a Vegas Golden Knights player, we all just have to count our blessings. A part of me too, although Reaves could escape with just a fine.

So, for him, getting any sort of suspension is a good start to a late justice against Ryan Reaves.